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Rudi: Don't tell the old man that Ford is dropping Mercurys

Once upon a time (in the days of vehicle brand loyalty) my old man drove nothing but Kaisers or Frazers. Back in the early 1950s one of them even had a rear window wiper, as I recall. These were the most beautiful machines a pre-school boy could ever imagine.

I'll have to check with Rudi, but, the Frazer might have been a 1948 Manhattan. Then came a 1951 (I think) green four-door Kaiser. There might have been another one in-between, or after the '51. I was too young to know. These autos are embedded in my mind thanks to Kodachrome color slides in a now-forgotten box in my attic, or pitched. I can't say for sure.

One of the photos has Art Hitchcock, Kaiser-Frazer dealer from Ottawa, and later Investors Diversified Services salesman, handing over the keys to my old man.

After the Kaisers and Frazers became fallen flags, my old man turned to Mercurys for some reason. There was a green 1954 beauty. One just like it sits in a used car lot in Kenton. Saw it this spring and just about drove around the block and pinched myself to make certain I was awake.

Then came a 1956 baby blue and white four-door. White walls the width of a man's tie, a V-8 under the hood, AM radio, no seat belts, wrap-around front windshield, hood ornament resembling an eagle in flight, cigarette lighter, and best of all, my old man had a spot light installed on the driver's side. These are illegal today. There's more to this car, but I can't remember the details.

Then came a 1963 black Mercury. The rear window actually rolled down. It was slanted in the opposite direction of rear windows today, for some reason. This car was a V-8 and I do believe the seat belts were installed later on instead of being standard equipment.

My old man also had a thing for car horns. Between the '56 and '63 Merc, he acquired a Chrysler with a horn that sounded like Nickel Plate diesel. He liked it so much, when he traded in the car, he took off the horn and added it to the '63 Merc.

Man, did that thing blow. Especially when you were learning to drive and Wilford Geiger instructed you to honk once every time you attempted to pass someone on the road.

Well, the Kaisers and Frazers are extinct, but I thought the Mercury would go on forever.

Until today. My hair - what's left of it - stood straight up when I read that Ford plans to end production of the Mercury line this year.

Good, God, what next? I'm glad my old man's not around to read this. He'd have griped and griped for days.

He might have gone out and bought one, just to keep it in the garage. It would have probably been one of those '57 Mercury Turnpike Cruiser gas hogs.

I only hope that Henry Ford doesn't find out.

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